Do you ever question if you have too little to no self-esteem?
Your life looks great on the outside, but you feel like a fraud on the inside. In fact, you feel like a mess, full of insecurities and indecision. It’s even hard for you to take a compliment. The voice in your head is your worst critic. It talks down to you, saying things that you’d never say to a friend. Deep down you worry others will be repulsed if they finally see you the way you perceive yourself. You know it’s time to do something about your low self esteem. It’s not healthy to keep beating yourself up, not liking yourself, and looking to others to feel better about yourself. But you can’t escape the negative self talk long enough to show yourself compassion. I specialize in helping people just like you with Self-Esteem Therapy in Fort Lauderdale, or anywhere in Florida!
What is Self Esteem?
A person’s self-esteem level describes how they feel about their behaviors, abilities, body, values, and overall worth. Each person’s self-esteem plays a vital role in how they approach the world, thus they find that their self-esteem often negatively effects one's happiness, achievement, or “success” in life.
What Causes Low Self-Esteem?
Low self esteem can have many causes. Sometimes it can start from problems growing up, traumatic events, relationships that were toxic or ended badly, or other significant negative life events. The cause of each person’s low self-esteem is often deeply personal and unique. Sometimes, the source of a patient’s negative thoughts is not clear at first.
You may notice the effects of low Self Esteem in your life:
Want more Self Confidence?
If you are reading the above and thinking, “That is so me!” then it is time to consider therapy for low self-esteem and confidence. I rely on years of professional experience as well as my own journey to support you in this big life change!
I will work with you with a non-judgemental and collaborative approach with the focus of your personalized goals and needs in mind. We will take things at your pace. I use a combination of exploring the root causes of your low self esteem and practical strategies to employ immediately so you can strengthen your self-confidence/ self-esteem, and begin developing the life you are capable of having and deserve.
Benefits of Therapy for Low Self-Esteem
- Discover your unique value and personal strengths
- Increase your motivation and drive to go after your goals.
- Prioritize yourself and your needs
- Cultivate self love and self compassion
- Learn self-care strategies
- Boost your confidence
- Stop people pleasing the wrong people
- Become more assertive in your relationships
- Set healthy boundaries with others and learn to say “NO”
- Act on what you want and leave procrastination behind.
What is the difference between self-esteem and self confidence?
Self-esteem is about your opinion of yourself. With low self-esteem, you don’t see your true value, and may find yourself stuck in negative thoughts, bad moods, and lacking in motivation.
Self-confidence is more about your belief in your abilities with tasks or social interactions. If you struggle with self-confidence, you may find yourself holding yourself back from taking risks, avoiding being your true self in social situations, avoiding striking up conversations with new people you want to talk to, and procrastinating on tasks that you want to complete.
While self-esteem and self-confidence often correlate to each other, this is not always the case. Sometimes, people with low self-esteem act as if they have amazing self-confidence. However when this occurs, you can definitely get the feeling that they are “overcompensating” or “trying too hard.” This happens because the self-esteem and confidence are not congruent.
How does low confidence affect adults?
As adults, we often carry with us negative beliefs about ourselves that limit us. When a limiting belief is triggered and activated, you see the world through that negative filter and it changes your decision making, body language, and social interactions.
For example, when you are stuck in a negative self belief, you may avoid taking action on a project you have set your mind on, especially if it is a risk. You procrastinate and when you do work on the task ,it feels “half-assed.”
It also affects how to interact with others. You may be more shy with your head down, poor eye contact, low voice, and body language that communicates uncertainty. This all sends messages to others that you are unsure of what you are talking about. You may even appear aloof, so others make the mistake that you are not interested in engaging with them.
What causes low self-esteem?
Low self-esteem can have several causes, and often stems from when you were growing up. It can come from messages you heard from your parents or peers when you were a child or teenager. It can stem from major events of rejection, failure, or abandonment, or childhood trauma. These events may lead to you forming core negative beliefs about yourself and these beliefs are hard to turn off.
Low self-esteem can also be self reinforcing. If you have a negative view of yourself, you may not take a chance you want to take, only then to tell yourself “I am such a coward.” You may take action on a task with hesitation, procrastination, and uncertainty, resulting in low performance or downplaying your results. This confirms your self-view of being inadequate or not good enough.
If you struggle with low self-esteem or confidence, you will look for proof that you will ultimately not succeed. It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Can self-esteem and self-confidence be improved?
Both self-esteem and self confidence can be improved. Generally, self-esteem needs to be primarily addressed. Once you truly feel your value and self-worth, you can then shift to taking actions with more confidence in the world as you don’t need to rely so much on validation from others. With increased sense of value you can have more confidence in your abilities and your interactions with others.
Some work on just their confidence. They listen to ideas from their peers, read books, and practice approaching strangers as a way to “push through it.” However, if the deeper self-esteem is not there, these efforts are limited in effectiveness. Taking risks still feels overly scary and a huge grind leading to acting with anxiety, awkwardness, and uncertainty. Then you still have to deal with failure or rejection when it inevitably occurs. With improved self-esteem, actions of confidence come more with ease and you are better prepared to handle when things don’t go the way you hoped.
Therapy can address the core issues of your self-esteem, so you can start creating new self-beliefs and truly feel your value. Therapy can also help you with the action steps that build confidence, so you can feel ready to take risks, complete goals, and freely socialize.
What areas of South Florida do you service?
We service all of South Florida. Our clients typically live in Fort Lauderdale, Pompano Beach, Pembroke Pines, Hollywood, Boca Raton or other surrounding cities.